Advice needed - job hopping


Hello friends,

I have been a nurse for about a year and a half now. I love nursing however, I’ve already been through so much in this short time. I have found myself becoming an unintentional job hopper. I am currently at a point where I’m stressed out so much and I have no clue what to do anymore and I just need advice

So, my first nursing job was in adult medsurg/tele. I left after 5 months because it was a highly toxic environment and a “nurses eating their young” situation. I was feeling burnt out and thinking I had chosen the wrong career.

I then chose to switch to psych, as mental health is sometime I am incredibly passionate about, and I eventually believe I would like to become a psych NP. I loved it. However, after 4 months, I started to feel guilty because I wasn’t doing what I thought a “nurse” should be doing at work. I wasn’t learning or using any of my skills, there were days where I was able to sit and watch Netflix a good amount of the day. I almost didn’t feel like a nurse at all. I wanted to be able to use my skills.

Working with kids has always been a dream of mine, so I decided to apply to a pediatric acute care unit at one of my local hospitals. I have been at this job 6 months now. At first, I was in love. However, as time has went on, I feel unhappy there anymore. I feel like an outcast at work and like I don’t fit in with the unit. Working in peds has a huge set of challenges that I was not prepared for at all. I know it’s like that everywhere, but I don’t think I should leave work feeling depressed and defeated every shift.

What is wrong with me? Why can’t I find something I truly love? I’ve cried and stressed and prayed so much but I just don’t know what to do. I really do not want to quit nursing. Part of me wants to go back to psych really bad, but I also want to use to my skills. But every hospital is so draining everywhere in my experience and I don’t want to be burnt out. I blame Covid for hurting my passion while working in the hospital because it caused the whole hospital system to chance. I feel like a lot of people can relate as well. I just need some advice because I do not know what to do at all

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